Rite now I feel like I am at one of my lowest points that I can get in life, and its frustrating to me. I think the major part of this is being sick. I don't feel like im getting any better or getting worse anymore, im at a stand still and it sucks. Im still always tired, and ever time I even attempt to eat something I feel like im going to be sick. Yes, my fevers are gone and I dont' sleep as much but this almost sucks just as bad.
School is getting really hard for me to keep up with. I try my best to get to class, but some mornings I just wake up and feel cruddy so I just go back to bed. I called and talked to the finiancel aid office today to talk to them about me with drawling and if i could keep my finaincel aid and they said I would have to pay it back. So there is no way that I can even think about with drawling rite now. I just don't know what to do anymore with school. I guess Im just going to have to try my best and get what I can done and hope that it will be enough to at least get me a C. I was hoping to get all A's this semester but it doesn't look like that is going to happen with everything that is going on rite now.
Then I have no idea what I want to be anymore. I want to be a teacher, but my real passion is being a doctor and helping kids. I would LOVE to be a pediatricion or something in the dental field. I just hope I can figure it out soon.
I know everything will work out in the big picture but rite now I just don't feel like it is going to. I just want to feel better and get back to my usual schedule. I hate not being able to go and workout like I should be doing. I hate not being able to go to school and get my education. It would be one thing if I was back in highschool but im in college now, and I have to pay for this education. I want to go back to work and see all my friends from there. I want to make money so I can pay for my bills that are coming up next week. I need money so I can go and get a new cell phone and provider and get a new car so I don't have to worry about mine breaking down on the way to school.
Being a adult is complicated and Im not sure how much I am enjoying it rite now. Hopefully it will get better.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
H1N1
The biggest thing in the news rite now is H1N1 or also known as swine flu. I never thought Iwould get it, then I got sick. At first I just felt like I had a normal head cold or sinus infection while in Brazil. As we started our adventure home I started feeling worse. My eye was watering and I looked like I was crying non-stop. I started getting a nasty cough and I was just tired. When I first got home I figured it was just from the travel and the week I had just had. I took some medicine and fell asleep hoping I would feel better in the morning. When I woke up the next morning I felt like crap. I had NO energy at all. I slept the whole day. Then I finally called my mom and asked her to take me to the doctors, something was wrong with me and I just didn't feel rite.
When I finally got into see the doctors we told them that I had just got back from being out of the country. They told me that they probably know what it is that is making me feel so sick. After doing the whole doctor examination they sat down and told me that I had H1N1. I didn't know what to think. The first thing that popped in my head was that I was dying. Its what I felt like and thats all I heard about it. I was upset and just wanted to go home and go back to bed. The doctor told me that I wasn't contagious anymore and that I could go back to school, but that I most likely wouldn't have the energy to. He told me it was best to stay home and rest. Then when my mom asked what kind of medications there was for it, he said none. All that would help would be IB profen. I just shook my head and thought "Great". I only had level 1 to. I couldn't even imagine what it would be like to have the full deal. Who knows maybe I did increase in levels, I sure did feel like it.
As the week went on I fell farther and farther behind in school. I was getting stressed and didn't know what to do. This is was the last thing that was supposed to happen. English was getting hard to do and it was my easiest. I went from doing everything from only being able to do a few assignments. Everytime I even attempted doing homework I fell asleep. I just didn't know what do to. I e-mailed my teachers and none responded to my e-mails, All i could think about was dropping out. Thanks to my coach I didn't though. He told me to keep going and get what I could done and start working on the stuff that is due now. So I did. I didn't get all caught up but as caught up as I was probably going to get.
Its Tuesday now and I finally made my way back to school. It took every ounce of energy but I did it. Hopefully I can keep it up and get back into a usual schedule again and finish up this semester as good as I can.
When I finally got into see the doctors we told them that I had just got back from being out of the country. They told me that they probably know what it is that is making me feel so sick. After doing the whole doctor examination they sat down and told me that I had H1N1. I didn't know what to think. The first thing that popped in my head was that I was dying. Its what I felt like and thats all I heard about it. I was upset and just wanted to go home and go back to bed. The doctor told me that I wasn't contagious anymore and that I could go back to school, but that I most likely wouldn't have the energy to. He told me it was best to stay home and rest. Then when my mom asked what kind of medications there was for it, he said none. All that would help would be IB profen. I just shook my head and thought "Great". I only had level 1 to. I couldn't even imagine what it would be like to have the full deal. Who knows maybe I did increase in levels, I sure did feel like it.
As the week went on I fell farther and farther behind in school. I was getting stressed and didn't know what to do. This is was the last thing that was supposed to happen. English was getting hard to do and it was my easiest. I went from doing everything from only being able to do a few assignments. Everytime I even attempted doing homework I fell asleep. I just didn't know what do to. I e-mailed my teachers and none responded to my e-mails, All i could think about was dropping out. Thanks to my coach I didn't though. He told me to keep going and get what I could done and start working on the stuff that is due now. So I did. I didn't get all caught up but as caught up as I was probably going to get.
Its Tuesday now and I finally made my way back to school. It took every ounce of energy but I did it. Hopefully I can keep it up and get back into a usual schedule again and finish up this semester as good as I can.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Home
The last 26 hours have been the longest hours of my life! Getting home was a number one on my list of thing yesterday when we were loading our plane to Sao Paolo. But it didn't come easy. First the plane was hotter than hot so it was so uncomfortable. Then as we were taking off we looked back at the airport for the last time and noticed that our luggage was still on the ground and not with us. That brought panic to all of us.
We arrive in Sao Paolo and go to collect what baggage did happen to land on the plane then headed over to baggage claim. We all had to fill out the information they asked us. They told us that our luggage should be sent to miami then shipped to our houses. So we all liked that plan. Then we get over to check in and the people at the desk told us that our luggage would not be sent to our houses, and that we would have to pick it up at the closest airport. For everyone that was ok because they were flying with the same carrier but us. The Idaho part of the team has to now hope that our luggage makes it to us.
When we finally get on the plane to Houston all I wanted to do was sleep. I didn't feel good and really just wanted to be home in my own bed. But the plane ride didn't go as well as I liked. I couldn't sleep at all and it was a very long 10 hours. Finally we touched down and headed over to collect our baggage and say goodbye to the team. It was so hard to do. Hugs, hand shakes, and tears were coming from all of us. It is hard to say goodbye to people you have become to close to, and when you know you may never see them again its even harder.
As Jesse, Rayborn and I went down stairs to the train it was quite and you could tell we were ready to be home. Jesse wasn't on the same plane as us so we put him on standbye. Luckily he got on the same plane and we flew to Denver. Same thing in Denver but our plane was booked so he didn't get on and had to wait for his actual flight. The flight from Denver to Boise felt like forever. I just wanted to be home and see my mom and dad. I was definiantly ready to be there. When we finally arrived we got off the plane and headed towards the doors. My mom was waiting their for me and I just gave her a huge hug. I was so happy to see her. Soon after my dad, brother, grandpa and cousins showed up. My grandpa just looked at me and started crying it made me realize how proud everyone was of me.
When we finally made it home I went and looked threw my luggage and seen what had made it home. None of my clothes and bathroom stuff. All my suvinears, and the video and pictures of my lifts. I got upset and then jsut kind of shook it off.
Im really happy to be home in my own bed. This trip was something I am never going to forget, and I can't wait tell next year. Thank you everyone who helped me get to where I am at!
Night!
-Kenzie Hower
We arrive in Sao Paolo and go to collect what baggage did happen to land on the plane then headed over to baggage claim. We all had to fill out the information they asked us. They told us that our luggage should be sent to miami then shipped to our houses. So we all liked that plan. Then we get over to check in and the people at the desk told us that our luggage would not be sent to our houses, and that we would have to pick it up at the closest airport. For everyone that was ok because they were flying with the same carrier but us. The Idaho part of the team has to now hope that our luggage makes it to us.
When we finally get on the plane to Houston all I wanted to do was sleep. I didn't feel good and really just wanted to be home in my own bed. But the plane ride didn't go as well as I liked. I couldn't sleep at all and it was a very long 10 hours. Finally we touched down and headed over to collect our baggage and say goodbye to the team. It was so hard to do. Hugs, hand shakes, and tears were coming from all of us. It is hard to say goodbye to people you have become to close to, and when you know you may never see them again its even harder.
As Jesse, Rayborn and I went down stairs to the train it was quite and you could tell we were ready to be home. Jesse wasn't on the same plane as us so we put him on standbye. Luckily he got on the same plane and we flew to Denver. Same thing in Denver but our plane was booked so he didn't get on and had to wait for his actual flight. The flight from Denver to Boise felt like forever. I just wanted to be home and see my mom and dad. I was definiantly ready to be there. When we finally arrived we got off the plane and headed towards the doors. My mom was waiting their for me and I just gave her a huge hug. I was so happy to see her. Soon after my dad, brother, grandpa and cousins showed up. My grandpa just looked at me and started crying it made me realize how proud everyone was of me.
When we finally made it home I went and looked threw my luggage and seen what had made it home. None of my clothes and bathroom stuff. All my suvinears, and the video and pictures of my lifts. I got upset and then jsut kind of shook it off.
Im really happy to be home in my own bed. This trip was something I am never going to forget, and I can't wait tell next year. Thank you everyone who helped me get to where I am at!
Night!
-Kenzie Hower
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Brazil
The land is beautiful here! Its so green and tropical, something I have never experienced before. The weather has been kind of moody you can say. One day it will be really nice and sunny, then the next it will be storming. But the storms are alot different than they are in Idaho. When it lightning the skies light up and turn almost pink, its beautiful. The thunder is alot louder too. One night I was laying in bed and it sounded as if a bomb had hit the ground. It was louder than i had ever heard before.
One thing I didn't enjoy to much here though was the humidity. It made me sick. Im difianlty not used to all the water getting in my lungs.
The food was pretty good for the most part. I tried really hard to have stuff I had never ate before, and that I knew we didn't have at home. We went to a Brazillian BBQ place that was AMAZING! They went around with all types of meat on scewers and gave you little pieces. I tried a chicken heart, and all different types of meats i had never tried before. Then they had a huge salad bar that had all types of different things. They had squid and I had never tried it before so I thought I would give it a try. It wasn't to bad. Just very rubbery, but that was kind of expected. Then they brought us this plate of what looked like really thin slices of fish covered in this brown sauce. Me and on of the coaches tried it, and it was raw salmon. It was delicious! No on else liked it so we ate the rest of it. It was really fun trying out different foods I had never had before.
Over all I loved Brazil. It was something that Im never going to forget. I made lots of new friends and met people from all around the world that are alot of fun and amazing. Im so happy that I got the expierence to come on this trip. Hopefully next year I will be in the Czec and doing the same thing.
=D
-Kenzie
One thing I didn't enjoy to much here though was the humidity. It made me sick. Im difianlty not used to all the water getting in my lungs.
The food was pretty good for the most part. I tried really hard to have stuff I had never ate before, and that I knew we didn't have at home. We went to a Brazillian BBQ place that was AMAZING! They went around with all types of meat on scewers and gave you little pieces. I tried a chicken heart, and all different types of meats i had never tried before. Then they had a huge salad bar that had all types of different things. They had squid and I had never tried it before so I thought I would give it a try. It wasn't to bad. Just very rubbery, but that was kind of expected. Then they brought us this plate of what looked like really thin slices of fish covered in this brown sauce. Me and on of the coaches tried it, and it was raw salmon. It was delicious! No on else liked it so we ate the rest of it. It was really fun trying out different foods I had never had before.
Over all I loved Brazil. It was something that Im never going to forget. I made lots of new friends and met people from all around the world that are alot of fun and amazing. Im so happy that I got the expierence to come on this trip. Hopefully next year I will be in the Czec and doing the same thing.
=D
-Kenzie
Friday, September 4, 2009
Airport fun on the way to Brazil =D
I woke up this morning at 4:30 and finished getting my stuff ready for my trip to Brazil. When me and my mom got in the car I felt sick because of my nerves. I couldn't believe it was already time to go, but i was ready. When we got to the airport and met my coach and my other team mate, Jesse and our adventure began. We left to denver at 7:01 and arrived at about 8:30. Me and Jesse went to go get breakfast and we couldn't find what we wanted. We were looking for parfiats and no where seemed to have them. Finally we found a little shop and got some breakfast and made our way back to our gate. As we were walking back we say what we didn't know was a guy or a girl. We both looked at each other and just burst into laughter, and said did you see that.
Then we finally get to load our plane to Houston where we would meet the rest of the team. When we finally arived we got off and we were kinda lost. If you haven't been to the Houston airport before it is broke into different sections. We were located at A wing at the time and we needed to get to E. My coach wanted to avoid having to check in at all cost but it looked like we had to. We finally get out and go get on the train/trolly. This thing was crazy! It was really slow but then as soon as it would get to the corners it would speed up and almost give you wiplash. Me and Jesse were joking around saying how we would get wip lash and then have to tell the head coach, Joe, that we wouldn't beable to lift because of the train. Our coach just looked at us like we were crazy and shook his head. We finally get over to our gate at about 2.
Since then we have been sitting here for about 5 hours and we still have another 3 tell we load to Brazil. But the team finally showed up and we are having alot of fun talking and getting to know each other.
Im so excited to get to Brazil and get settled, Im defiantly ready for a shower and a bed though. And Im really tired of sitting in this airport!! =/
Then we finally get to load our plane to Houston where we would meet the rest of the team. When we finally arived we got off and we were kinda lost. If you haven't been to the Houston airport before it is broke into different sections. We were located at A wing at the time and we needed to get to E. My coach wanted to avoid having to check in at all cost but it looked like we had to. We finally get out and go get on the train/trolly. This thing was crazy! It was really slow but then as soon as it would get to the corners it would speed up and almost give you wiplash. Me and Jesse were joking around saying how we would get wip lash and then have to tell the head coach, Joe, that we wouldn't beable to lift because of the train. Our coach just looked at us like we were crazy and shook his head. We finally get over to our gate at about 2.
Since then we have been sitting here for about 5 hours and we still have another 3 tell we load to Brazil. But the team finally showed up and we are having alot of fun talking and getting to know each other.
Im so excited to get to Brazil and get settled, Im defiantly ready for a shower and a bed though. And Im really tired of sitting in this airport!! =/
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Stress...
Im starting to feel the stress of college already and its only the second week of school. But then its probably because I'm leaving for a ten day trip on friday and im trying to get all my work done so I won't have to worry about alot of it while I am gone. Then the worst part about this week is that it is going by so FAST!!! I don't even feel like I have enough time to even do all of my work. Im up tell 12 or 1 working on it, then i have to get up at six and go to school. I honestly feel like I'm getting nothing done and it is so frustrating. I probably just need to relax and calm down and sit down and just do it. This has always been a problem of mine. When I know I have alot of work to do I stress really bad. Ah...
Everything else is going pretty great though. My last workouts have been going pretty good, and I'm happy with where I am at with my training. I can't wait to leave for Brazil! Three days and I'm out of here. Im starting to realize that this plane ride isn't going to be fun though. haha. Friday is defiantly going to be a long day. Boise Airport at six to catch our seven o'clock plane to Houston, four hours for that one. Then we have a wonderful five hour lay over, then nine p.m we are off to Brazil for a good 10 hour flight. Thats already 14 hours and we still will have another flight to catch when we get there. I think that flight is only like a hour though so that won't be to bad. But goodness thats alot of flying! haha... =D I really am excited though. Finally my countdown is in the single digits and soon enough it will be going into hours and minutes. =D
School is going pretty good so far other than the homework. I really am enjoying my geology class rite now. I love studying the earth and everthing that it does. It intrigues me how the earth has hurricanes, tornadoes, volcanoes, earthquakes, and even how the continents move. Im defianlty excited to learn more about everything the earth does. Im really excited for the lab. I am defiantly a hands on learner. History is going ok. We are still going threw what we are going to be doing in class and we still haven't gone over what our assignments are, so I have no idea what i am supposed to do and i am supposed to turn it in before i leave! (big part of stress level right now. =/) I really like this english class. I enjoy being able to do assignments when I have time do to them, instead of being stressed that it is due the next day. Spanish is kind of boring rite now just cause its a spanish 1 class and I took 2 years in high school. But its a good review for me. Hopefully it will help me alot with speaking it better.
Alright I better get started on my other homework. =P
-Kenzie Hower
Everything else is going pretty great though. My last workouts have been going pretty good, and I'm happy with where I am at with my training. I can't wait to leave for Brazil! Three days and I'm out of here. Im starting to realize that this plane ride isn't going to be fun though. haha. Friday is defiantly going to be a long day. Boise Airport at six to catch our seven o'clock plane to Houston, four hours for that one. Then we have a wonderful five hour lay over, then nine p.m we are off to Brazil for a good 10 hour flight. Thats already 14 hours and we still will have another flight to catch when we get there. I think that flight is only like a hour though so that won't be to bad. But goodness thats alot of flying! haha... =D I really am excited though. Finally my countdown is in the single digits and soon enough it will be going into hours and minutes. =D
School is going pretty good so far other than the homework. I really am enjoying my geology class rite now. I love studying the earth and everthing that it does. It intrigues me how the earth has hurricanes, tornadoes, volcanoes, earthquakes, and even how the continents move. Im defianlty excited to learn more about everything the earth does. Im really excited for the lab. I am defiantly a hands on learner. History is going ok. We are still going threw what we are going to be doing in class and we still haven't gone over what our assignments are, so I have no idea what i am supposed to do and i am supposed to turn it in before i leave! (big part of stress level right now. =/) I really like this english class. I enjoy being able to do assignments when I have time do to them, instead of being stressed that it is due the next day. Spanish is kind of boring rite now just cause its a spanish 1 class and I took 2 years in high school. But its a good review for me. Hopefully it will help me alot with speaking it better.
Alright I better get started on my other homework. =P
-Kenzie Hower
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